Nick's Notes

[Gondor]

Sounds like a good job well done though Nick.

[kitbasher]

Aah, Nick.  You're a good bloke being on hand to sort out John's business.  Circumstances like his can be difficult to work through but it's good that he's got you (and presumably others) on his side to help him out.

How's you're mum during all of this?

[Rick Lowe]

Aah, Nick.  You're a good bloke being on hand to sort out John's business.  Circumstances like his can be difficult to work through but it's good that he's got you (and presumably others) on his side to help him out.

How's you're mum during all of this?

Agree with that. It's not easy.

And yes, how is Mum?

[Nick]

Aah, Nick.  You're a good bloke being on hand to sort out John's business.  Circumstances like his can be difficult to work through but it's good that he's got you (and presumably others) on his side to help him out.

How's you're mum during all of this?

Aah, Nick.  You're a good bloke being on hand to sort out John's business.  Circumstances like his can be difficult to work through but it's good that he's got you (and presumably others) on his side to help him out.

How's you're mum during all of this?

Agree with that. It's not easy.

And yes, how is Mum?

Thanks guys. Mum seems to be coping OK. We kind of knew this was coming - like watching a snow fall become an avalanche.

John was half expected to be out of hospital today or tomorrow. The nurse called this morning and asked us to bring a change of clothes for a few days so he may be in until Friday. My sister will take Mum over there tonight. His family can't help much - it's practically only his nephew and I don't think he is local to John.

[Rick Lowe]

Having family nearby is always helpful. And you do what you have to, cos it's family. 

[Rheged]

Well done Nick!  Many of us have had the misfortune to have "been there, done that, got the mental scars"  so we've a pretty good idea of how taxing this has been, both physically and mentally.  You have our congratulations, sympathy and support if you need it.

[Rick Lowe]

Well done Nick!  Many of us have had the misfortune to have "been there, done that, got the mental scars"  so we've a pretty good idea of how taxing this has been, both physically and mentally.  You have our congratulations, sympathy and support if you need it.

As our esteemed colleague has stated. 

[NARSES2]

Well done mate  , but don't forget to take care of yourself as well.

Chris

[Nick]

We got John back here yesterday. He's slept nearly the whole time and isn't eating. The drugs don't help. I think we'll have to get him into a hospice soon and not home like he expects.

I had a good day out yesterday at the RAF Museum with the club. We meandered around the hangars for a couple of hours and then found our way to Hannants where we boosted their income significantly 
After that it was down to the pub for drinks and a late lunch.
Nice! 

I'm planning to take Mum away at the end of July to see the marvels of Manchester. She wants to visit the new gardens at RHS Bridgewater and hasn't seen Manchester since the 1960s. So I said I'd take her there and booked a Travelodge in Salford Quays.

[kitbasher]

We got John back here yesterday. He's slept nearly the whole time and isn't eating. The drugs don't help. I think we'll have to get him into a hospice soon and not home like he expects.

I had a good day out yesterday at the RAF Museum with the club. We meandered around the hangars for a couple of hours and then found our way to Hannants where we boosted their income significantly 
After that it was down to the pub for drinks and a late lunch.
Nice! 

I'm planning to take Mum away at the end of July to see the marvels of Manchester. She wants to visit the new gardens at RHS Bridgewater and hasn't seen Manchester since the 1960s. So I said I'd take her there and booked a Travelodge in Salford Quays.

Check out Chetham's library if you can, or John Ryland's Library.

[Nick]

Check out Chetham's library if you can, or John Ryland's Library.

Now that's a pair of good ideas! I recall walking past Rylands Library when I was up there in Feb. Interesting looking building but it was late in the evening and closed. Not too far from Waterstones IIRC.

Chethams I have been told about via a friend who was very into early printing methods.

Will see what Mum feels like doing as she won't want to walk too far. Thanks for the tips 

[Nick]

We had a good few days in Manchester last week. Went up via the Peak District for the scenery and stopped at a pair of former railway stations on the way, one is now the Peak Village shopping centre where we had lunch.
On the Tuesday we admired the flowers at RHS Bridgewater and then went to the Lowry to look at paintings by Lowry. They do a great thing called Lowry 360 where you stand in a room and they project his 1953 Going to the Match painting onto all the walls and point out little details. Really brought the art to life.

Wednesday was another day of culture. After we visited the Cathedral Mum went shopping at the Arndale Centre and I went to the library. Chetham's Library was founded in 1653 and is the oldest public library in the English-speaking world. It houses 120,000 books and other works all of which can be requested for perusal.
We got the tram there from the hotel and it was very nice and easy.

Thursday we came home via Holmfirth and Last of the Summer Wine country. Very pretty and gave my new car a good workout. Overall it was a very good trip.


John - he's back in hospital after another fall. The carers found him on the floor again. His cancer has spread all over and he will be going to a care home soon. We're just keeping an eye on his untidy house and overgrown garden. We found out on Monday that he pays every thing by direct debit apart from the council tax - so I've had to chase that up.

[kitbasher]

Glad you enjoyed Manchester - Chets is fantastic (next time up there visit John Ryland's Library).

Hope all goes well supporting John.

[Nick]

John died on Monday night. Hospital called us at 9:50pm so I took Mum over to Chelmsford to see him and collect his belongings. Didn't get to bed until 1am.
I'm glad my nieces didn't see him as he was in that bed - all old and skinny and worn down. They were upset enough on the phone calls last week.
His family finally got the message that John was really not well and went to see him at the weekend. They were shocked at how bad he was.

My sisters are helping out. Sara and Mum went over to the house on Tuesday for a tidy up. They took 2 large SACKS of pills to the pharmacy for safe disposal.
Lisa is on her way here today until next week or when Mum tells her to go home 

I already brought his car over to our place for safekeeping. Took it to a car wash for the first time in years and removed all the green growth. My plan is to keep it clean and repair it so that either my niece can have it a s first car or we sell it.

Friday we sort out the death certificates and other paperwork. Thankfully there's a service to tell all the govt departments of his death - Tell Us Once. Bet we have to tell them twice..... 
It's all the banks and utilities too but they will continue (at a lower cost) until we can sell the house.

Getting quotes to get the garden cleared is hard work. One guy wants £2800!! It's 80ft by 20ft, not Buckingham Palace gardens! 

The funeral is being arranged with the Co-Op. It'll be in mid-late September at the earliest. Nothing major, just a simple cremation service and a room at a local pub for the afternoon.

[Rheged]

It's NEVER easy, Nick,  and family Rheged offer their sympathy both for the loss of John and  to all those doing the sorting out any death causes.  As far as I can tell, you're doing an excellent job in unfortunate circumstances.     If you can, treat the cremation service as a celebration of John's life.


  The "Tell us once" system  worked well when first my dad and then 9 years later my mum died.  Even the banks ( mainly Lloyds  in our case) were as helpful and sympathetic as they could be. It's worth considering getting a solicitor to sort out details........it can take a huge load off your shoulders and  I think it was worth the expense in our case.   

As to tidying the garden, a friend local to me had the same problem two years ago, but for half an acre.  £300 in the local Young Farmers  Group beer and barbecue fund got the whole area cleared and rotavated in a weekend.  We even got an invitation to the barbecue afterwards.